6 Ways You Don’t Know You Are Ruining Your Relationship

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The truth is a relationship can record little or no success without a relative amount of effort from both parties involved in it. The irony of this fact however is that even as you sometimes make efforts to improve the bond in the relationship, you might actually be doing things that will create little problems which could grow into bigger ones as time goes on. Some of the things you do may become habits which are bound to create arguments between you and your partner and may perhaps leave you both less satisfied.

For this reason, we bring to you 6 things are seemingly good good efforts put into a relationship but which may actually be running your relationship subtly. We believe creating a balance with them or taking them out of circulation may have a profound and lasting effect on your relationship.
Giving Your BFF More Attention
It is quite easy to subtly create problems in your relationship when you give your best friend a lot of attention. The level of attention might be quite minute and insignificant at first but as time goes by, your boyfriend might begin to feel threatened. It is essential to create a balance between both and make your boyfriend understand what’s going on.

READ: Qualities We Want Our Perfect Girlfriend To Have (1)

Seeing Your Partner In Light Of Your Friend
The ultimate relationship goal is always to see your partner and your friend as one of the same but this has the tendency to make you unhappy. It is important you understand the uniqueness of every individual and relating to them as such.

Expecting Your Partner To Be Empathetic
This is more common with women as they expect their boyfriends to feel and relate to the way they are feeling. Expecting your partner to always feel natural empathy for you and always knowing the right thing to say can only lead to problems. It is important for you to recognise the fact that men and women have different thought processes. For instance, check out a scenario when you had a spat with your colleague at work and you vent to your partner. Chances are your partner would want to get to the root cause of the spat. This may lead to either of you getting defensive and frustrated, which may cause a huge blowup at the end of it all. A friend on the other hand could listen to you attentively and empathise with you. This is not to say your partner shouldn’t be your confidant even though you shouldn’t be totally reliant on them.

READ: Qualities We Want Our Perfect Girlfriend To Have (2)

Watch The Surprises
Surprises make for wonderful and exhilarating experiences in relationships and should be well utilised. They could range from bringing your partner a gift of beer, chocolates, mobile devices and so on. However, too much of surprises may make your partner feel smothered and choked especially if the relationship is new. It’s a nice thing to think up surprises to captivate your partner but make sure you don’t do it more often than nought. Doing it continually may make your partner feel defeated and unable to keep up with you.

Care For Yourself
It is nice to cater about your partner and try as much as possible to make them always have a good time but also remember to care for your own needs as well. A lot of the time, people in relationships feel that sex is all about their partners pleasure and this is mostly common in women. A lot of the time, they fail to bring things up because of the fear of rocking the boat but it is important to ensure that the both of you understand what is going. It is important to talk with each other about your sex lives and other areas and things that you want to be done differently. These things are best done during none sexual moments so that any form of ego bruising can be avoided.

READ: Defo Not Embarrassing – Things You Should Be Comfortable Doing In Front Of Your Man

Not Encouraging Them
If your partner has a passion for something or is looking to develop at work, it is important you cheer him on and encourage him whatever way you can. Not doing so could send the wrong signals to them that you are unsupportive. Also, sprucing him up generally even when they are happy about it could upset him and have a negative effect. Sometimes, people tend to focus on a few of the wrong things going on in their partner’s life rather than the very many things that are right. Thus, it is essential to create a fine line between encouraging them to be better and making them feel they don’t measure up. It is this better to err on the side of caution than lose it all.



Normal everyday dude uniquely different in an everyday manner, a young man that strongly believes in the Nigerian project. I'm a mixture of science, arts and politics. I can be engaged on twitter @SheriffSimply

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